But even if we don’t realize it, unhealthy habits can damage even our most treasured relationships, especially with significant others.
Think back to when you first met your spouse or your partner: that rush of excitement every time you had the chance to spend time with them, or the feeling that you couldn’t bear to be away from them when life took you on your own journeys through the day. But even if we don’t realize it, unhealthy habits can damage even our most treasured relationships, especially with significant others
Leaving the Past Unresolved
First of all, you should confront, examine, and resolve your past. Your personal history largely defines the person you are - the result of all your experiences, emotions, and memories. If you have past issues with previous romantic partners, or even with your family members, it will affect how you approach
your current partner. If you don’t deal with these problems, they will only continue to drain the joy from your current relationship. People tend to see their partners as less desirable if they have too many emotional hangups.
Not Speaking Up
You may have heard that good communication is the true key to a blissful relationship. There is some truth in that. If you’re feeling unfulfilled, it could lead to ever-deepening unhappiness in your relationship. Don’t hesitate to speak up and express your needs - one sign of a damaged relationship is the fear to say something due to feeling stifled or the dread of a negative reaction. Don’t hold them up to expectations you know full well are not possible for them to achieve, either, as that is just as much of a bad habit.
Clinging to Myths or Idealizations
Building off of the point about unrealistic or impossible expectations is the advice that you should strive to see your partner as a real person. Relationship myths and idealizations are equally harmful to a healthy relationship - some of the beliefs include avoiding conflict, thinking that every relationship should be equal, or that passion lasts forever. Likewise, seeing your partner as this perfect person who is fun all the time, and the ideal cure for your depression or other mental health conditions
is also prone to damaging your relationship as well.
Lack of Communication
As we noted above, communication is vital to each and every relationship. After all, no one is a mind reader. If you build your relationship expecting that your partner will be able to sense your every mood or predict your every feeling, that is quicksand for a relationship. Passive aggression, unwillingness to listen, and mistakes and misunderstandings can ruin a relationship just as easily as disputes and bitterness can.
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